The Rich Kids of Instagram review – yacht parties, helicopter shopping
So, I haven’t really got to grips with Instagram yet. Eager not to be left behind, I’m hoping that The Rich Kids of Instagram (Channel 4) can help steer me in the right direction. I want to be rich, I want to be a kid, I want to be on Instagram; this sounds like a show that’s been tailor-made for me. (If you think this is all too much about me, then you’re probably just a sad jealous hater troll; and you know what? I don’t care.)
Right, this Lana – @LanaScolaro – seems like a lovely girl and a really great role model and guide, to help me build Brand Me on Instagram. Lana, 20, a multimillionaire heiress, spends her time jetting and helicoptering between London, Ibiza, New York and Monaco. She’s also known for not being Robin Thicke’s wife but still having his hand up her skirt. No wonder she’s got 23,000 followers.
Right now, Lana’s in Monaco, in a beautiful topless Bentley, with her cute dog bulletscolaro_thepuppy. They’re going shopping, of course, and she’s wearing Louboutin boots and a Hermès Birkin bag worth £25,000 to £30,000. She had another Hermès Birkin bag that she graffiti-sprayed by accident … well, not really by accident, she just felt like doing it, and then putting it on Instagram, of course. Oh my God, I love it, that’s so cool, like a statement. Lana spends £15,000 a month on shopping.
What does she think the average person spends, the man behind the camera asks her? “Erm, I think the average person a month spends on shopping like £3,000 to £5,000?” she says.
I’m not entirely happy about the guy asking the questions. Why would Lana know what an average person spends on shopping when she’s so very un-average herself? It’s not about knowing what’s average, it’s about inspiring average people to be a bit less average. It’s almost like he’s got an agenda, doesn’t entirely approve. Probably a hater himself. Well, let me ask you something, Channel 4 troll, hiding being your camera: how many Instagram followers have you got? Exactly. You ain’t no role model, bruv.
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